Wednesday, April 9, 2008

You are What you wear!

Who Am I Now?
Did you know that we’re all judges? Consciously or sub-consciously we judge and categorize every person we encounter, based in great part on the clothes they are wearing.

By understanding this process of observation – and using it in reverse – I create costumes for characters in a script. The job of a costume designer is definitely part social psychologist: I watch people to evaluate how each person’s clothing functions in expressing his or her individual character and how that person fits into larger society. Armed with that information, I can help actors to build characters by dressing them in ways that will lead the audience to judge them as the script designates.

The process is similar when you dress to speak before an audience.

For me, one of the most interesting parts of costuming for TV and film is the wealth of information that can be conveyed by minute detail. Changing just one item of clothing or accessories can change the character. In a class I teach on the art of creating costumes, I play a game with the students called, “Who Am I Now? What Is My Story?” For this game, I wear a black turtleneck sweater and pants, pearl stud earrings and black low-heeled shoes.

During the first half hour of the class – while introducing myself and outlining the class – I change jackets. I begin with a turquoise, cotton casual jacket with large silver buttons. The students take notes on who they think I am, including what kind of job I have, how much money I make, where I live and what car I drive. Then I change to a more tailored red jacket and ask them to pay attention to the psychology of the color and style change. Who Am I Now? This has opened their eyes to the necessity of attention to detail.

Will you be speaking to inform, inspire or entertain? How you dress will depend on the general purpose of your speech. Here are some tips to help you:


Speak to Inform
When you speak to inform, you present information or technical concepts. First impressions count. You must establish your credibility in your particular field at first glance, whether you are the CEO of a Fortune 500 company or Jack Hanna with a Lemur on Good Morning America. I would be confused if I saw Jack Hanna in a suit and tie talking about endangered animals in the wilderness. No doubt that’s why he dresses for his presentations in clothing that highlight his expertise as a zoologist.

Your clothes speak. The goal is for the audience to understand that you are the expert and to accept your credibility. When you speak to inform, you want the audience to respect you and then take action. You are achieving an appearance of strength, power and leadership. This look helped me with my film costuming career. When I knew a day “on set” would be challenging, I dressed for power – usually in black with a sophisticated jacket and a striking accent of jewelry to draw focus to my face. In this way, I was able to do my job with less resistance from the strong personalities known to inhabit the film industry.


Speak to inspire
When you speak to inspire, you are telling a story that offers a point of view leading to change. Your goal when you dress is to break down any wall between you and the audience, while maintaining a powerful persona. You could be less formal, a little softer, and more conversational. That might run the gamut from a softened conservative look, such as a dark blue suit rather than a black suit; to the very casual fashion of Wayne Dyer, the expert in self-development; to the out there air of professional speaker Mikki Williams, whose style has been mentioned in this magazine.

Your clothes speak. When you speak to inspire, you want the audience to reach out to you, embrace your ideas and grow personally. Your goal is to be accessible, credible and authoritative.

More game playing. My third outfit in the “Who Am I Now? What Is My Story?” game is a moss green antique kimono. When the students complete their notes on the kimono-clad character, I add a psychic/hippy necklace and ask if the necklace changes – or confirms and clarifies – their description.


Speak to Entertain
When you speak to entertain you will be telling a story that you hope will grab the attention of the audience and add enjoyment to their day. There are two ways you can dress to tell the story. The rule in both cases is that the garments must be congruent with the story:

You might dress to suggest the setting of your story. Francis Hodge, Professor Emeritus of Directing, calls costumes “scenery on the move.” In a recent Toastmasters area contest, a young businessman told the story of his trip into a remote mountain area where his life was challenged. He was dressed in a suit, tie and dress shoes. He demonstrated the physical challenges and spoke of his fear. After the contest I talked with him about the idea of wearing casual clothes to better illustrate the story. Later, at the division contest, he told the same story but wore an oxford cloth, button down shirt – open at the neck with no tie. His sleeves were buttoned at the wrist. He wore tan khaki pants pressed with a crease and new hiking boots. He had taken my advice in a very interesting way. By wearing casual clothes he illustrated the setting of the story. By wearing them clean and neatly pressed he painted a picture of his day-to-day life, amplifying the fact that he had stepped out of his comfort zone and learned a life lesson. His choices told both sides of the story.

You might dress as the main character in the story. In a screenwriting class, I learned that each character must contribute to the outcome of the story. The same holds true for the garments and accessories you use as a costume for your speech: Each item contributes directly to the telling of the story and its outcome.


How Do You Choose the Garments?
Always consider three important guidelines when choosing what to wear for a presentation:

  • The clothes should not take focus from you, the speaker.
  • You need to be able to perform comfortably and effectively in the costume and accessories.
  • The costume should not tell more story than you have time to present.

Once you’ve determined that the costume is appropriate, comfortable and fits your speaking needs, you’ll be ready for the next step. It’s time to weigh the effects of one or more of these design elements, whether you wish to suggest a setting or take on a character role:


Color – The color you use and the way you use it can create power, aggression, focus, humor, gentleness and many other emotions.

Color can create a positive or negative effect. On the TV show Hill Street Blues, I costumed the character of a young female drug addict. She lost her battle with drugs when she overdosed at the end of the third episode. The actress was a thin, frail-looking blonde. For her first change, I dressed her in washed-out tan, which was not her best color. To illustrate her decline I dressed her in dirty yellow and for the final episode in putrid yellow-green, each time making her appear closer to death.


Contrast – Contrast in shades of light and dark as well as the contrast between patterned and solid fabrics can create sophistication, exaggerated humor or low-grade bad taste. Medium- to large-size jewelry can also create contrast. Remember, small details are often not seen from the stage. And don’t forget, a speaker standing onstage, dressed completely in black, can look flat and two-dimensional – without contrast.


Focus – Focus should be kept near the head and gesture area, unless otherwise required by the story, as with Dorothy’s red shoes in the film The Wizard of Oz.


Line – The hard line created by the straight skirt of a woman’s business suit makes a very different statement than the soft line created by a three-tiered peasant skirt. For men, there is a vast difference between the hard line of a double-breasted suit and the soft line of a corduroy sport jacket worn open.


Exaggeration – Exaggerate with caution. It can be great and it can also overwhelm the speaker’s form, making him or her invisible.


A Delicate Balance – Each of these elements of design offer a range of choices from simplicity to complexity. I believe a degree of simplification along with focus should be considered even when the character is frilly, complex or exaggerated. Too many good ideas add too much!


Tips for Fine Tuning
Now that you have the basics, here’s how to perfect your style.


For Women:

  • If you wear a straight skirt on stage it is important, first, to check that your skirt hem is level. While checking your hem, be sure to wear the shoes you will wear with the skirt. Using a yardstick vertically from the floor to the bottom of the skirt, measure the hem length at five-inch intervals all the way around.
  • Being seated on stage can cause modesty challenges. It helps if the skirt is an inch or two longer. When you are seated place one foot behind the other, hold your knees together and tilt them to the left or right. This creates a ladylike, modest appearance.
  • Wearing shiny or dangling earrings may be distracting to the viewer. If you are physically animated, your speech can become a story about earrings. So limit the loops! Clanking bracelets and necklaces are distracting as well.
  • Keep your hair off your face. When it falls forward, be aware that a segment of the audience cannot see your face. In the theater, this visibility is called “sight lines.” Don’t be disrespectful to the audience by obscuring your face.
  • Cream-colored lipstick makes it difficult for the audience to see your lips. In most instances it also makes you look sick.


For Men:

  • Your tie choice is an opportunity to visually enhance your power, credibility, accessibility and creativity. The wrong tie could distract the audience or confuse their perception of who you are. The second-hand store is a good place to expand your collection of ties for a very nominal cost.
  • Your tie should be tied so the point rests at the bottom of your belt buckle. If you have trouble tying the tie long enough you may need tall man ties, which are available at most department stores, in men’s clothing or the accessories department. Ask the sales-person for help choosing the correct tie length.
  • When you are speaking and gesturing, your coat sleeves can appear short. If you do a lot of speaking it might be worth having one jacket or suit coat finished with the sleeves an inch longer than normal.
  • The worst pant length is too short. In general, when you are standing, your socks should not be visible.
  • Polished shoes and well-groomed nails are a plus.

As you can now see, there are many ways your clothing and jewelry choices affect your presentations. I challenge you – look in the mirror and ask yourself, “Who am I now...What is my story? Am I projecting the image of a person who is qualified to speak on this subject…Do I convey the story I want to tell?” Make educated, attentive choices. Decide to dress your part – and never be misjudged again!


Karen Hudson, ATMB, CL founded the Mindful Communicators club in Woodland Hills, California. She is a retired costumer in the film and TV industry and now teaches costuming. Reach her at hudsonkt@wwdb.org.





Miked for Sound

If you’ll be wearing a microphone, your clothing and jewelry should be chosen with care to work with the equipment.

  • The microphone will be placed in an area near your neckline. There should be no fabric or jewelry that could rub or bump on the microphone when you move. The microphone will pick up the scratching sounds of hard surface silk and polyester fabrics, nylon windbreaker jackets and plastic rain gear rubbing together.
  • You will need a waist band, belt or pocket to carry the sound pack.

Saturday, March 8, 2008

Speaking about the Unspeakable

Speaking About the Unspeakable

If you’re a seasoned Toastmaster, you probably feel comfortable speaking in any number of situations – presenting a new business proposal, giving a toast at your daughter’s wedding, making an acceptance speech or launching a campaign for political office. But there are some topics that make even the most experienced and eloquent speaker squirm and lock his tongue in silence: Death. Grief. Illness. Depression. Sexual abuse. Family trauma. They’re not your typical speech subjects, and yet they’re such universal issues.

Speaking about difficult topics can require more tact, knowledge and preparation than the average presentation, and it naturally triggers a lot of questions. How important is it to have personal experience with the topic? How do you manage your and your audience’s emotions? And is it okay to make jokes when speaking about a sensitive subject? Learn from three individuals who – using different approaches – have touched audiences across the world by speaking about difficult, highly emotional subjects.


Dell deBerardinis
After developing a treatment model for victims of sexual abuse, licensed psychotherapist and personal development specialist Dell deBerardinis closed her private practice and launched a speaking career in the early 1990s. Since then, she’s traveled across the United States and Canada, spreading awareness of what she calls “our number one health epidemic: child abuse.”

Many of deBerardinis’ talks are targeted toward mental-health specialists, but she also speaks to the general public. Often there will be victims in the audience, which makes her sensitive topic even more precarious.

“You can’t expect not to push anybody’s buttons. Sometimes, the talk brings up a personal issue that makes somebody emotional,” she says. “There have been difficult moments when somebody in the audience is hostile or I get hostile feedback, and it happens more often with topics that are sensitive. My job is to stay professional no matter what and stay tuned into what happens in the audience.”

In cases when emotional people approach her after the talk, deBerardinis makes sure she’s able to offer a phone number or other information about where the person can turn to receive help.

DeBerardinis says what she does best is connecting with the audience and making them feel comfortable with the topic. “I maintain eye contact, involve the audience when I can, and I honor and respect them. I talk to a lot of health care professionals and I’m constantly humbled by them. I keep in mind that they can bring something to the talk too.”

Sometimes, she uses humor to lighten the mood and diffuse some of the seriousness inevitably associated with the topic. “I make jokes about dysfunctional families,” she says. “But I don’t joke about the specific topic that I’m talking about and I probably time it a little differently.”

DeBerardinis’ talks focus more on the personal than on statistics; she thinks sharing a personal experience makes the presentation more real, like revealing her own story about growing up with alcoholic parents. But, she cautions, telling the audience how you battled to overcome a trauma is more important than the fact that it happened to you. “When I share that there was alcoholism in my family, I try to do it with discretion and when I think it will benefit the audience as a learning experience. I think [sharing personal stories] helps create a bond, but you can’t do too much of it because then it might have the opposite effect and push people away. There has to be a balance.”

For speakers who are preparing to tackle a topic like child abuse for the first time, deBerardinis offers the following advice: “Educate yourself, do the research and be prepared that there will be people in the audience who will be touched by it. The most important thing is that the speaker is comfortable with the topic, so do whatever it takes to get to that point. Spend a little time with people who work with it and interview people who have experience with it.”

She adds, “Another thing that’s so important when you’re talking about topics like this is to offer solutions. We’re talking about problems, but as a speaker it’s also my job to present some things that you can do about it.”

Dell deBerardinis lives in Texas and is the author of Sexual Abuse: Recognition and Recovery, and Therapy Made Simple. Learn more about deBerardinis at www.speakerdell.com.


Bobby Smith
If somebody would’ve told Bobby Smith 25 years ago that he was going to switch his career as a law enforcement officer in Louisiana for one as a professional speaker, he probably would’ve scoffed at the thought. But in 1986, Smith was shot in the face and blinded by a violent drug offender. Eleven years later, his 22-year-old daughter Kimberley was killed in a car accident. The traumas Smith went through – losing his eye-sight, job, independence, self-confidence, marriage, and finally his daughter – catapulted him onto the international speaking circuit.

The first time he told a group of fellow law enforcement officers about the assault that left him blind, Smith broke down and started sobbing uncontrollably half an hour into the talk. “I was an emotional wreck. It was horrible,” he says, acknowledging he wasn’t really ready to speak about his trauma at that point. Smith didn’t realize it at the time, but speaking, and as a result helping others deal with trauma and loss, eventually became a sort of therapy. That doesn’t mean it’s for everybody. “You’ve got to be careful with that. Just because you have a story to tell doesn’t mean you have to tell it. Not now,” he says.

Speaking has been profoundly personal for Smith from the get-go, and he says having experience with the topics he covers has been key to his success. “I’m a storyteller and all my stories are personal,” he says. “There are a lot of people out there who are hurting and they need to hear about it, not just from a textbook standpoint.”


“Telling the audience how you battled to overcome a trauma
is more important than the fact that it happened to you."



Smith has seen many experienced speakers put audiences to sleep by loading up their talks with PowerPoint presentations and too many faceless statistics, while leaving out the stories that could potentially move and engage the listeners. Smith says he usually outlines every presentation in his head but never uses notes or speaks from a lectern.

His speeches often bring people to tears, with some people sobbing openly, but humor is also an important component of his self-taught speaking style. “I’ve learned to laugh at myself and I laugh with people, not at people. I laugh about being blind and some of the things I do as a blind person,” he says. Sometimes, Smith gets emotional when speaking and he doesn’t always know what part of the presentation will trigger it. “I don’t plan to cry and I don’t plan to laugh. I just show the real me and expose myself to the audience,” he says. “I call it the ‘Southern style.’ I speak from my heart and what you see is what you get.”

Bobby Smith is the author of Visions of Courage and The Will to Survive. Learn more about Smith at www.visionsofcourage.com.


Sara Rich Wheeler
Most parents can’t think of anything more painful than losing a child, and as certified grief counselor Sara Rich Wheeler discovered 20 years ago, the need to talk about it is tremendous. Wheeler was in charge of a new program about stillborn babies and newborn death at a Wisconsin hospital when she and a colleague were asked to speak about the topic at two national events in the late 1980s. The response to their talk was so overwhelming that they decided to take the program on the road. Now the Dean of Lakeview College of Nursing in Danville, Illinois, Wheeler often speaks to health care professionals as well as lay audiences about grief and how to cope with miscarriages and infant death.

“I’ve worked with a lot of people who have had miscarriages, and listening to them has taught me a lot. When I speak about grief I share their stories, and by doing that I can teach somebody else,” she says. In addition to real-life stories, she always tries to provide a theoretical framework for what grief really is, to help people understand the process of healing. “I work really hard, when I speak, for people to ‘get it.’ If you talk to people, especially on topics like this, and they don’t ‘get it,’ they won’t do anything about it.”

Wheeler always tries to show up to a speaking engagement an hour ahead of time, to get her audiovisuals ready and introduce herself to people as they come in. Sometimes she plays music to create a certain atmosphere and sets up some books or other things for people to put their hands on.

She also makes an effort to create a protected and safe environment, where it’s okay for people to cry if they feel the need. It’s not unusual for people to become upset or even angry when they are reminded of a situation that happened to them, Wheeler says. “Sometimes people have even gotten up and left, and if that happens I usually ask somebody to check on them. I’ve noticed some national meetings are not prepared for that, but some people get overwhelmed with emotions and they need somewhere to go.”

When speaking about grief, it’s important to choose your words carefully, Wheeler says. Words that are routinely used among health care professionals often come across as insensitive to a lay audience, like “incinerating” when talking about cremating the remains of a fetus, or “spontaneous abortion” when talking about a miscarriage.

Often, people in the audience want to share their experiences with grief as well, and if there is time Wheeler tries to accommodate that need. This can be risky, however, since she doesn’t know what people are going to say or how long it will take. “I want to recognize what people have to say, but I don’t let them dominate the session,” she says. “I try to be tactful about it.”

Wheeler, who hasn’t lost a child herself, says her training and education coupled with work experience helped immensely once she started speaking publicly about grief. She recommends that those who want to try it work hard on their credibility, possibly even by getting certified in a certain area or publishing a book.

“If you’re going to be speaking about this, you’d better have the facts right. If you mispronounce words or misstate the facts, it ruins your credibility,” she says. “And when you start speaking to people who work in this area, they may ask some very intricate and complicated questions. You need to have the background and experience to answer them, or the humbleness to say that you’re not sure and turn to somebody in the room who might have an answer. If I don’t know the answer, I don’t fake it.”

Sara Rich Wheeler lives in Indiana and is the co-author of When a Baby Dies: A Handbook for Healing and Helping, and Goodbye My Child.


Linda McGurk is a communications specialist and freelance writer based in Indiana. Reach her at www.mcgurkmedia.com.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008


How To: The Joy of Journaling

Write things down and change your life!

By Joy Lardner, DTM


Write things down and change your life! When you embrace the joy of journaling, astonishing things begin to happen.

A few years ago, I competed in our club’s International speech contest against Asma, a Toastmaster friend. My speech was titled, “Perfect Peace;” Asma’s was called, “Write It Down.” I thought my speech was awesome, but Asma’s speech touched more hearts, mine included. Asma took her speech and went on to win at higher competitive levels. Through her words, she addressed the importance of recording one’s goals on paper to bring them to fruition. Asma told a spellbound audience about her sister Uzma, who had been disowned by their parents for marrying against their wishes. Desperately desiring family acceptance, Uzma recorded her 50 lifetime goals on paper, placing the goal of reuniting with her parents first on her list.

Uzma converted those lifetime goals into a computer screensaver that she could read every day. That year, Uzma achieved 25 percent of her lifetime goals, simply by writing them down. And yes... shortly thereafter, after innumerable futile attempts, she reunited with her family.

As I followed my friend Asma through the various levels of Toastmasters competition, watching her win again and again, hearing her message over and over, I realized that somehow I never seemed to tire of it. That’s because Asma’s message was one to which I have always subscribed. I have always believed in the power of writing things down, yet had grown away from that practice. It was time to return to something I enthusiastically endorsed: keeping a journal. It was time to come back to my love of writing. It was time for me to come home.


"The single most important reason for writing down your
dreams and goals is this: A dream carried around in
your head remains a dream until you take action."



I started keeping a journal around age 10. I toted a little orange notebook around in which I recorded my insights on life... as much insight as a 10-year old could muster. I thought I was worldly with much to record, and my journal indulged me by being a silent listener.

I continued to keep a journal throughout my teenage years, recording every puerile teenage angst I felt. Trivial upsets that I now handle with grace and ease seemed so serious at the time! Yet, the very act of writing things down was my form of emotional release, my catharsis. It was like confiding in a dear friend, and indeed, my journal was a very dear friend.

In my mid-20s, my writing grew up: Fewer petty insights and more positive acceptance and reflection on what is. Again, my journal had helped me to grow. Today, I continue the valuable practice of journaling.

I believe journaling is a tool of the soul. Writing things down quickly connects us to our inner being. Journaling is a life-long, life- changing activity.

So, how does writing things down work?


Make Decisions/Find Solutions
Your journal is a concrete decision-making tool, a place to reflect and analyze a situation. To this day, when faced with a difficult decision, I reach for blank paper, draw a line down the center, and immediately record the strengths and weaknesses of the challenge at hand. This helps me evaluate my options through a combination of logic and gut feeling.

Seeing things in black and white provides some objectivity, but I make a final decision based on gut feeling. Why heavy reliance on intuition after such logical analysis? The act of writing things down and logically weighing both sides is a necessary first step to reaching decisions. When making conclusions, however, I allow my intuition to take over.


Draw Your Dreams to You
The single most important reason for writing down your dreams and goals is this: A dream carried around in your head remains a dream until you take action. The physical, purposeful act of writing down your dreams, wishes and aspirations in black and white demonstrates a commitment to yourself and the universe that you mean business – that you expect your dreams to manifest outward and are prepared to make it happen.

For example, create a top-10 list of what you want to do in your life and refer to it daily. Revise the list as you achieve objectives. Think constantly of what you want, keep reading your list, and your mind will work toward achieving it.


Spark Your Creativity
Journaling sparks our creativity. Our intuitive talents are always alert and we don’t want to miss out on those bright, life-changing ideas. When inspiration knocks we want to be ready.

Often, when I am riding home on the subway, completely relaxed and observing the world rolling by, an idea for a speech, poem, seminar or article for publication will pop into my head. I then retrieve my little notebook and jot down such ideas for later conversion into something more permanent. How do you capture your creativity when it cries out for attention?


Try the power of journaling in your life by writing down 10 things you like about yourself, five good things that happened today, five goals you are working on, and 10 things that bring you ease.

• Ten things you like about yourself: This exercise will help to expand your self-esteem. It’s a reminder of how much there is to love and appreciate about ourselves, exactly as we are. I love an analogy about how we sometimes walk through life like light bulbs covered with masking tape. Learning to appreciate ourselves is like pulling the masking tape off of the light bulb and allowing our true brightness, our natural light, to shine through.

• Five good things that happened today, or even this week, trains us to focus on the positive in our lives. Whenever we count our blessings and adopt an attitude of gratitude for the wonderful things the universe has bestowed upon us, we attract even more positive energy and increase the flow of wonderful things coming our way.

• Five goals you are working on: Recording them helps you develop future-oriented thinking and moves you closer to those goals. Remember Uzma? Demonstrate commitment to what you want from life. We cannot achieve our goals if we don’t know what they are. Not only must you write down your goals, you must post the written words in a visible place where you can read them every day. As the saying goes: If we don’t know where we are going, any road will take us there.

• Ten things that put you at ease lifts your spirits and creates something to which you can refer when you need an emotional boost. Your list could include: enjoying a warm bath or a cup of tea, spending time with family or taking long walks.


Always and Nevers
To benefit from journaling:

  • Always tote around a pen and a small notebook.
  • Write whenever inspiration strikes.
  • Avoid recording your gripes. Stay away from victim mode. Griping comes easily to most of us; it’s human nature to obsess on what’s not working in our lives. By giving attention to our problems, we allow them to run our lives. We set ourselves up for misery when we put our lives on hold until things are fixed. By doing so, we miss out on all the happiness there is to be had.

Some aspects of our lives will always be less than perfect. The key to happiness is awareness of this fact, and a firm resolve to ask ourselves, ‘What would I be doing if this problem didn’t exist? Where would I focus my energy if this annoying person, place or event were not in my life?’ Once you know the answer to exactly how you would behave if the problem were non-existent, you can go about and behave as if it were so. Your journal will help you. We expend much energy training ourselves to be positive, why jeopardize our efforts through negative thinking? It is too easy to adopt victim mode. Let’s not do that. Keep your journal positive and you will attract the positive.

The simple act of writing things down will improve your life. Simply observe the people you consider to be happy and successful and ask them if they carry around an “idea” or “insight” notebook. I’m betting the answer is yes. Write things down and change your life!


Joy Lardner, DTM, is a charter member of the CU at Noon Toastmasters Club in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. In 2003 she published her first book of poetry titled, Quietly Knowing, Warmth for the Soul.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Art of Speech Writing

The Art of Speechwriting
Just because you are a good speaker doesn’t mean you are a good speechwriter. The advent of PowerPoint software has made the fully scripted paragraph an endangered species, replacing it with bulleted lists, catchy headlines and whiz-bang special effects. But good writing remains at the heart of good speechmaking, particularly when the intent is to inspire or motivate audiences. If you’re among the fortunate few, you may have staff speechwriters or communications experts to help you craft that spellbinding speech. But most of us aren’t that lucky, which means having to face down the terror of the blank computer screen on our own.

So what’s the key to writing a memorable speech that doesn’t lean heavily on PowerPoint for speaker support? We talked to some of the best speechwriters in the business – who between them have written speeches for U.S. presidents, cabinet members and CEOs of some of the world’s largest companies – about what it takes to write a speech that is music to the audience’s ears.


The Research Process
One thing these pros agree on is this: A speech is only as good as the quality of research and reflection put into it. To that end, Ken Askew, a freelance speechwriter who has written speeches for luminaries like President George H. W. Bush and Lee Iacocca, is constantly on the prowl for ideas to use in speeches, whether his writing assignment is next week or next year.

Askew’s low-tech idea file consists of a large box into which he throws notes jotted on napkins, offbeat news stories emblematic of broader trends, intriguing studies or statistics and clever advertisements. This work usually pays off handsomely down the road. For example, he stumbled across a statistic mentioning the highway with the lowest average speed in the world: the Autobahn in Germany, which most would associate with having the fastest speed. Although people sometimes drive at speeds exceeding 150 mph, when there is an accident on the Autobahn – of which there are many – traffic is backed up and idling for hours, making for the lowest average speed.

“I tore that out and threw it in a box, thinking I might be able to use it down the road for a speech on the necessity of regulation,” Askew says. “Good speechwriters need to be idea sponges. You can’t be too critical when you spot something interesting. If it hooks your imagination, there’s a reason for it, and who knows how you might be able to apply it in the future.”

Hal Gordon, a former speechwriter for Colin Powell and the Reagan White House, is of the same mind regarding research. “Always collect more information than you can possibly use,” Gordon says. “It’s far better to have a mass of information and try to boil it down to 30 minutes than to not have enough and figure out how to pad the speech. If you have more information than you can use, then it follows that you are selecting the very best of that material.”

Culling only the best data, anecdotes or humor – using only one sparkling example to support a point when you’re tempted to use two, for example – is a key to brevity, the hallmark of good speeches. “Have you ever heard a speech that was too short?” asks Jane Tully, president of New York-based Tully Communications, an executive speechwriting company, in an article written for her web site. “I doubt it. But we’ve all squirmed through presentations that droned on well beyond the allotted time – and our most vivid memories of those occasions have little to do with the speaker’s message.”

If you want audiences to stay on the edge of their seats, says Tully, take a hint from mystery writer Elmore Leonard, known for his spare but gripping prose. How does he do it? According to Leonard, “I leave out the parts people skip.”


One Word After Another
While elite speechwriters have varied writing habits, there is a recurring theme: Most suggest getting your core thoughts and ideas down in some form before putting your critic’s hat on. The key is not to edit yourself too early in the process, lest you get stuck at the starting gate.

Askew writes his first drafts in the form of a relational database. Basic ideas and concepts are written on large Post-It notes, placed on a whiteboard and then connected with circles or lines. “I move the Post-its around as I think through the speech,” Askew says. “I always include far more than I can fit in a speech by design, which makes editing a challenge. I usually end up pulling about 80 percent of the notes off the board.”

Like many professional speechwriters, Askew often squirms when asked by clients to provide an outline before writing a speech. He prefers to write a one-page speech summary, what’s known in the field as a “destination” document. “It communicates the gestalt of the main point, the feel, tone and what it is you are trying to achieve with the speech, or the central metaphor you want to use,” Askew says.

David Green, president of Uncommon Knowledge, an executive speechwriting firm in Haworth, New Jersey, compares a client asking a speechwriter for an outline to a book publisher requesting a detailed roadmap from a novelist. “Novelists I talk to often say they start out intending for their story to go in one direction, but their characters wouldn’t let them go there, so they had to go a different way,” says Green. “In the course of writing a speech, I often take it in directions I didn’t expect.”

Although many professionals opt for a more free-flowing, stream-of-consciousness approach in writing a first draft, some won’t move forward until they’ve honed their first page or two to near perfection. Capture the audience early, this thinking goes, or prepare to lose them quickly.

“I am tortuous about the first page, super tortuous about the first paragraph and insanely tortuous about the first sentence or two of every speech I write,” says Askew.

Green prefers to write out an entire speech, then reduce it to a series of talking points. He takes a cue from speech coaches, who believe speakers should start by creating six or so summary-type sentences – essentially one-liners – each with a compelling central point and story. Those statements can then be threaded together into a 30-minute speech. “Good speakers are good storytellers, and that doesn’t just mean having good stories or anecdotes,” Green says. “It also means having a rhythm and sense of pace in the presentation, all of which comes from good writing.”

When crafting speeches for executive clients, Marilynn Mobley, a senior vice president for Edelman, a public relations firm in Atlanta, also writes out her entire script word for word before creating summary statements. “The benefit is it allows the speaker to see the whole rhythm of the speech and the flow of it,” Mobley says. “That overview helps the speaker use the bullet points to better capture the intended pacing and timing.”

Mobley uses a color-coding method to help ensure she has the right mix of content in her speeches. Once she finishes an early draft, she marks each line with a different colored marker – red might be for facts and figures, green for anecdotes, and yellow for humor. She then spreads out the whole speech on the floor or tapes it to a wall to allow her to scan for wide swatches of red, green or yellow. “I’m not necessarily looking to achieve equal balance between the different types of information, but rather to determine whether I am going a long time just providing data or humor, for example,” Mobley says. “I might rearrange some things, add in some more humor, look for other ways to explain data.”

Don’t think the terror of confronting a blank computer screen is limited to amateur or part-time speechwriters, says Green. Even veterans like himself experience writers’ block. One key to overcoming it, he believes, is to simply get started, letting the first draft “pour out like cheap champagne” without being overly critical of what’s appearing on screen. “When I first began writing, I had to make every sentence perfect before moving on to the next,” he says. “It took me years to be able to write in a more organic, freestyle method.” If a thought or idea occurs to you, Green suggests getting it up on the screen somewhere, even partially formed, with the knowledge that it will eventually get incorporated and revised in a way that makes sense.

Green also believes a change of scenery can do wonders for freeing up mental log-jams. “When I worked for an advertising agency in New York City, New York, I used to tell my boss, ‘you should pay me to walk back and forth from the subway to the office, because that’s where some of my best ideas come from.’”


Writing for the Ear
Mobley believes one of the biggest mistakes that novice speechwriters make is writing for the eye rather than the ear. She suggests reading out loud everything you write, since it not only helps refine rhythm but can unearth hidden problems. Mobley, for example, once wrote a speech that used the phrase “in an ironic twist.” Upon speaking the line, however, she found it something of a tongue twister. “On paper it looked fine, but once I tried saying it, it was a different story, so I dropped it rather than risk stumbling over it.”

In a blog written for the web site of Ragan Communications, Gordon stressed the importance of drawing pictures with your words. “The ear processes words more slowly than the eye,” he says. “Accordingly, drawing a picture with words will often help the audience grasp the message that the speaker is trying to convey.” For example, Gordon cites a famous remark associated with President Franklin Roosevelt: “I hate war.” While the quotation is accurate, it has diminished impact as a sound bite removed from its context. Roosevelt’s full statement read this way:

“I have seen war. I have seen war on land and sea. I have seen blood running from the wounded. I have seen men coughing out their gassed lungs. I have seen the dead in the mud. I have seen cities destroyed. I have seen children starving. I have seen the agony of mothers and wives. I hate war.”

Says Gordon: “Simply saying ‘I hate war’ would have only been a catch phrase. After the word picture Roosevelt drew from his own experience, no one could doubt that his assertion, ‘I hate war,’ came from the depths of his heart.”

Writing for the ear means capturing the way audiences speak, not how they write, Mobley stresses. In everyday conversation, people typically use contractions; when they write they usually don’t. “Using contractions may not be proper writing, but it is plain speaking,” Mobley says. “We should write like we speak.”

The key, says Laura Lee, president of OverViews, an executive speechwriting company near Detroit, Michigan, is not to “create grandiloquent rhetoric, but to express your own personality, passions and perspectives in ways that those who know you best will say, ‘Yes, that’s him.’”


Avoiding the PowerPoint Trap
It’s easy to fall into the trap of using PowerPoint, the omnipresent and user-friendly presentation design software, in a way many speakers do today: with bulleted lists and text-heavy slides serving as the centerpiece of a presentation. Yet because that’s what many audiences have come to expect – speakers leaning heavily on PowerPoint as a crutch by “reading from the screen” – it also represents a missed opportunity. Green, for one, promotes more creative uses of speaker support as a way to help his clients’ messages stand out from the pack.

In one 40-slide speech Green developed for a client on the value of innovation, some 60 percent of the slides featured one-liners making a provocative statement or question, and the rest contained optical illusions that enforced the idea of looking at things from different perspectives. “It allowed the speaker to create a break in the flow of his comments and create a sense of ‘chapters’ by having these interesting visuals,” says Green.

In another speech, Green’s mission was to highlight the difference between simplicity and complexity in product features. Rather than spelling out the distinction in a series of snooze-inducing bullet points, Green used the paintings of Jackson Pollack to represent complexity and those of Mark Rothko to represent simplicity. “You want your audience to have some kind of takeaway, and they’re not going to be able to take away an entire 30-minute speech,” Green says. “What they’re most likely to take away is one or two compelling ideas or good lines.”

In the Summer 2007 issue of the Claremont Review of Books, Diana Schaub, chairman of the political science department at Loyola College in Maryland, argued that use of bullet points has undermined the quality of speechmaking in the U.S. “Hierarchy may be antithetical to democracy, but it is essential to logic,” she wrote. “The replacement of paragraphs with bullet points indicates the democratization of logic. But the equality of all sentences destroys the connectedness of thought. The scattershot technique of contemporary speechmaking can bowl you over if the speaker has sufficient force of personality, but it can’t pierce your mind or heart, and it certainly can’t do it as written rather than spoken.”

Adds Mobley to the debate over the much-used software: “There’s a reason you never see PowerPoint used during a eulogy.”


The Golden Rule
Whatever process you choose to research, write or revise a speech, it pays to remember a golden rule of speechwriting: Audiences don’t want to know how much you know, they want to know what they can do with the knowledge you’ve accumulated.

“The really great writers and speakers give us insight, not just ideas,” says Mobley. “A good idea makes the audience say, ‘I never thought of that.’ But insight makes them say, I never thought of it that way.’”


Dave Zielinski is a freelance writer who divides his time between Wisconsin and South Carolina.





3 Rules for Capturing Audience Interest

David Green, president of Uncommon Knowledge, an executive speechwriting company in New Jersey, offers three rules for virtually any speaking challenge – rules he says will help any audience sit up and take notice, for the right reasons.


Rule 1: Counter-program
The audience has expectations. If they’ve heard you before, they think they know what to expect. If they haven’t heard you, they group you with other keynoters or speakers they’ve heard from your industry. Green says you have to break through their preconceptions. If everyone else is using text-heavy PowerPoint support, consider using dramatic photos. If everyone else is forecasting the future of your industry, focus on eye-opening lessons from the past. If your public persona is fire-breathing, use a more “fireside” style.


Rule 2: Speaker support should only support
You’ve seen them all. Text-flooded PowerPoint slides that look like pages of a book. Charts dense with information, with typeface reduced to barely readable size so it all fits on a slide.

Every time a new slide comes up, the audience stops listening to the speaker while reading the slide. Then there are those presenters who speak straight from their slides, adding few ad-libs or spontaneous thoughts.

People can either read the slides or listen to the speaker, but they cannot do both simultaneously. If you are simply parroting your slides, you’ve essentially made yourself superfluous, maybe even a nuisance. Hal Gordon, a former speechwriter for U.S. General Colin Powell, recounts the story of Jack Welch, former CEO of General Electric, attending a PowerPoint presentation given by a GE staff member. The speaker was reading directly from each slide, and finally Welch, fed up, called out, “Look, I can read as well as you can. If this is your presentation, why don’t you just hand me your slides and we can be done with it.”

If you must use PowerPoint, use it as an outline only to prompt your memory and give your audience a roadmap. After all, it’s not your software giving the speech – it’s you!


Rule 3: Play the Audience
A speech is live theater. You don’t have to entertain, but you do have to tell a compelling story. The audience is not out to get you…usually. But they won’t hang on your every word either, unless you lure them in.

So know your audience – and your speaking environment. The audience will expect something different from you as a conference keynote speaker than if you are leading a panel or having a face-to-face discussion with them. Then use your best sense of what they want from you – and give them something more, or something different, or something that bends their perspective.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Visualize Success – And It Can Be Yours!


At one point in my life I had a horrible case of the “why bothers.” I couldn’t get my engine running, let alone rolling to its destination. Then I ran into an old friend, Chad, who told me to set some goals.

“You’re not listening,” I informed him. “Goals won’t help – I have no energy! I can’t do anything.”

Chad promised that committing goals to paper would supply me with plenty of energy and enthusiasm to reach my objectives.

“Just try it,” he said.

This is the time of year when resolutions are made and broken. But don’t sell the practice short. Experts in motivation and achievement claim that setting a goal, imagining how it would look and feel to reach that goal, then putting a plan into action to reach that goal – are the three hottest tickets to your success.


Setting Goals
“A goal is something that a person wishes to achieve,” says Gary Glasscock, authority in goal-setting and visualization techniques and owner of a life coaching business called Manifesting Your Life. “What you hold your focus on is what you will receive, especially if you look at that goal as already achieved. It will draw the goal to you.”

Glasscock has seen this principle at work in his life as an increase in income, client base and referrals. Plus he has seen clients establish a great deal of success.

“Life does not go according to plan if you don’t have a plan,” says Gary Blair, the Goals Guy and President of the GoalsGuy Learning Systems in Tampa, Florida. “A goal is created three times. First as a mental picture. Second, when written down to add clarity and dimension. And third, when you take action toward its achievement.”

Richard E. Williams, a former member of the Positive Picker Toastmasters Club near Cleveland, Ohio, agrees. As a business professional, he sets financial, physical and career goals.

“I thought I was already a very accomplished presenter before joining Toastmasters,” he says. “I was surprised to learn that I had some serious refining to do to reach the professional presenter level. I achieved my presentation goals due to the goal-setting work I had done up to that point.”

As a result, Williams became an advisor for presentation skills with the national governing body for the sport of bowling and helped start a Toastmasters club at the organization’s headquarters.

A goal is an objective; it’s something to aim for. There’s a saying that you won’t hit the target until you know what you’re shooting at. Goals drive us in the direction of the dream that most often occupies our thinking.

Bill Brown, President of the Rancho Speech Masters club in Rancho Santa Margarita, California, uses goals to win speaking competitions. His preparation includes learning what is expected at each level of competition. For instance, one of his objectives was to listen to a member who would compete against him.

He uses feedback from others to fine-tune his speech, constantly changing it to meet the demands of higher-level contests. “I ask myself how I can be more expressive, use body language to better make a point and use greater vocal variety,” he says. And as a result of his diligence, Brown won both the division and district contests.

There are as many different ways to approach setting goals as there are people who make them. But certain points are central to most of these techniques:

  • Be clear and specific. Beware of vague goals, like “to become a better person” or “lose weight.” Both are good objectives but offer little direction; they don’t answer the question, How?
  • Make them measurable. Lose how much weight and by when?
  • Set a time limit. “You must hold yourself accountable to deadlines and adjust tasks accordingly,” says Blair. “Slipping deadlines is a symptom of poor execution and a lack of discipline.”
  • Break projects down into small, more manageable units. Rather than setting a goal of losing 30 pounds, make one for losing five pounds this month.
  • Establish stepping-stone goals. In order to lose five pounds, you can aim for walking 20 minutes three times a week or eating five helpings of fruits and vegetables a day.
  • Write them down. Most experts consider this a crucial step. Writing your ambitions down makes them real and keeps them in your mind longer. Plus it establishes a commitment to yourself.
  • Post goals around the house. Experts suggest displaying Post-it notes or other signs around the house – perhaps on your computer monitor or on the bathroom mirror.



Practicing Visualization
It’s been said that golfer Jack Nicklaus never took a shot before first picturing it in his mind. This technique brought him six green jackets for his (six) wins at the Masters Tournament, one of the most prestigious golf events.

Visualization is being used more and more in competitive sports. For example, Olympic gymnasts spend hours each day visualizing their perfect performances.

This practice involves picturing the outcome, emotion or object that you desire. It enhances motivation, direction and commitment. On a neurological level, the brain doesn’t differentiate between an actual and an imagined experience. Picturing images causes some level of physical sensation, leading to muscular responses. It’s not only the brain that has a memory; the muscles do as well.

A principle of energy is that energy of a certain quality or vibration tends to attract energy of a similar quality or vibration. This is why successful thoughts manifest success in our lives. According to books such as Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain, and The Secret by Ronda Byrne, we attract into our lives whatever we think about the most, believe in fiercely, expect to occur and envision most vividly.

So when a golfer visualizes making a putt from the rough, the muscles and nervous system react to the mental images of correct golf technique. Toastmaster Richard Williams applies the same techniques to coaching bowling. “Using visualization prior to performance in a sports activity allows the athlete to practice in his mind. I encourage the athletes to surround themselves with the cues of the competition environment; to take in sights, sounds and smell to experience a deeper, more effective visualization than trying to do it in a surrounding that is nothing like competition.”


"As long as you are willing to do whatever it takes for as long as it takes,
no one will be able to prevent you from reaching your goals."



A bowler might visualize feeling confident and comfortable, excited about an upcoming win, feeling his fingers gripping the dense material of the ball lying cool in his hands, balls thundering down the alleys next to him, taking his regular number of steps to the line and allowing the ball to glide off his fingers, humming down the lane and mowing down all of the pins.

“This is process visualization,” Williams says, “and is essential to continued success, as it builds muscle memory that is necessary for consistent physical performance. I also encourage the use of outcome visualization. It serves as a motivator to work hard to achieve the outcome that is important to them.”

Outcomes can include a sun-bleached beach after spending months completing a project, the warm feeling of satisfaction from a job well done, or a celebratory lunch.

“For years we have been hearing how important visualization is from trainers and motivational speakers,” Glasscock says. Now we know how it works. It keeps us focused, in-tune with what we hope for. There’s an old saying, Where attention goes, energy flows.”

When you first begin to practice mental imaging, you may feel somewhat awkward and silly – and likely to disbelieve in its benefits. But it can be considered a mild form of practice in which you work out problems by thinking through to their solutions. Keep in mind what international motivational speaker Denis Waitley says, “If you get it right in drill; you’ll get it right in life.” Imaging positive outcomes is one way to reach success.

Here are some steps to visualization:

Close your eyes and picture the mental images of your goal vividly and precisely.
Use the senses to engulf yourself in the visualization
Sight – What do you see around you? What colors are present?
Which grab and hold your attention?
Hearing – What sounds are you hearing? Are there sounds that appear suddenly,
others appearing later? Are these sounds appealing or not?
Smell – Are there smells that strike you, pleasant or unpleasant?
How do the odors affect you?
Taste – Is there anything to taste? Are you eating or drinking?
Do you have some lingering taste in your mouth?
Feel – What do things feel like? How do the clothes you’re wearing feel on your skin?
What does the air feel like? Is it cool, dry, breezy?
Picture movement – your movements, things outside of you in motion. Quick motion is better,
although subtle movements might catch attention.
Employ your emotions.
– In your mind celebrate how you would feel reaching this goal.
– Allow yourself to experience the completion of your victories – picture joyful elation,
wide smiling and perhaps, jumping up and down.


Taking Action
Goals and visualizations fade away without action.

“In order to receive a victorious outcome, perseverance is the only option,” Blair says. “As long as you are willing to do whatever it takes for as long as it takes, no one will be able to prevent you from reaching your goal.”

After Chad taught me to set goals, I considered the outcomes of his goals. What I learned from his experience convinced me that the process of goal-setting and visualization might work for me, too.

Later I learned that Chad came from an alcoholic home where he was either ignored – or punished severely. He saw the future as a way to get out of the house. When it happened, he didn’t know what to do or where to go. He moved from one friend’s house to another, at times begging on the streets.

Sitting on the stoop of a liquor store one morning, Chad met a clean-cut stranger who sat down with him. Just before Chad got up to move, this man told him about goals.

“I looked at him as quizzically as you looked at me when I mentioned goals,” Chad said. “I thought, me? Set goals? But I set one – to graduate from high school. Then I set another, to get a job. Then I really got down to this goal business; I even added visualization.

Today Chad owns a string of print shops, has three happy and healthy kids and a model marriage. He says he owes his success to the skill of goal-setting and the practice of visualization.


Judi Bailey is a writer in Lakewood, Ohio, and a frequent contributor to this magazine. Reach her at author48@cox.net.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The Power of Choice


by Bo Bennett, DTM

Where we are today is a result of choices we have made in our past. Choices as minor as what to have for breakfast to choosing what we want to do for a living. Each of us was born with the gift of free will and we have the right to choose our destiny by a series of lifelong decisions. Accept responsibility for who you are and where you are today and understand that with the exception of some external forces, you are where you are because of the choices you have made.

What about choices like going to work? You may be saying, "I have a family to support and I cannot choose to skip work. If I skip work, I get fired." The fact is, you choose not to skip work and keep your job. The choice of skipping work is yours and you must accept the consequences of each of your decisions. Even in the extreme situation that someone has a gun to your head, you have the choice to do what they request, or get shot. Choice is always present and always yours.

What about the person who gets hit by a bus? He obviously did not choose to get hit by a bus, but providing he is still alive, he can certainly choose how he responds to the situation. He can spend the rest of his days focusing on "why me?" and how unfortunate he is, or make millions writing the best seller "Life After Being Hit by a Bus" and help others who happened to get whacked by a Greyhound while picking up a penny on the highway. Although we cannot always choose what happens to us or around us, we can choose how we deal with it.

A successful person understands this concept well and understands that her choices make her who she is today. She does not use the negative statement "I HAVE to" but rather "I WANT to". Having to do something makes you subconsciously believe that you have no choice in the situation, which is rarely ever true. Once you truly understand that you choose to do something rather than have to do it, your attitude becomes positive and you see the benefits rather than focusing on the negative.

Other people will respect you for your candor when being more truthful with a statement such as, "I prefer to". The words "I have to" are often used as a defense mechanism and used as an excuse not to do something. Understand that you have a choice in the matter and be savvy enough to avoid the words "I have to". Those with whom you communicate will respect you more for it.

How Marketable Are You?

by Bo Bennett, DTM

Imagine a huge retail store where instead of products on the shelves, there were people. This is a store where hiring managers go to "buy" employees for their business or organization. The shoppers think like all shoppers do when buying products. They may ask questions such as, "Do I need this product? How will I benefit from using this product? Is this product outdated or replaced by a better product? Is it reliable? Is it priced right? Do I have a choice of many similar products or is this one unique? Now think of yourself as a product on a shelf in this store. Are you a hot item that is consistently out of stock? Or are you one of those items that sit on the table in the front of the store marked "damaged goods - price reduced"?

When it comes to selling our labor in the form of employment, sometimes it helps to think of ourselves as products. This helps us to better understand the needs of employers. A product that is considered "marketable" is one that can be exchanged fairly easily for something else of value. When people are considered marketable, they can exchange their labor for something else of value, such as a satisfying career.

So the question is, how marketable are you? More important, what can you do to become more marketable? Here are some suggestions.

* Define the ideal skill sets desired for your industry. Before you can work on your skills, you must know what skills you need to be working on. Do not make assumptions here. Don't think the skills you learned back in the 60s while attending college are the same skills required today. Talk to your manager, mentor, or any industry expert. Read the trade magazines and keep on top of the industry.
* Be involved in continual education. Remember that "formal education" is not the only kind of education. There are many ways to educate yourself in addition to enrolling in more formal classes. Once you know the skills that will help you to become more marketable, you can begin to develop and/or improve on those skills. Being marketable is about being competitive and desired.
* Be a leader. Being good at what you do is fine, but when you are good at what you do as well as being an excellent leader, you stand above the crowd. Having leadership qualities can make you a "hot item"!
* Promote yourself. Become a master of self-promotion. When someone says your name, you want the response to be "I heard of [him/her]... [he/she]'s that [guy/lady] who [insert great quality here]". Don't expect anybody to promote you for you (unless you are paying for it)--you must do it yourself.

Now what if you define the skill sets needed for your industry and realize that you have no desire to acquire the skills needed to be seen as marketable? Consider changing vocations. What are your skills? What skills would you enjoy learning? In which industry would you enjoy being? Ski equipment may not sell very well on Miami beach, but it will sell in Vermont. If you are unwilling to change your product, then change where you are selling it.

Don't be the product that ends up in the "price reduced" bin. Know what it takes to be marketable in your chosen profession and make the effort to not only stay ahead of the curve, but make an effort to lead the pack. Educate, promote, and lead and you will be the hot item that never sits on the shelf for very long. marketable

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Remembering Numbers


by Bo Bennett, DTM

In today's computerized, handheld PC, and pen recorder filled world, there seems little need to remember numbers. The truth is, despite all the gadgets available there are still times when accessing a gadget to jot down or record numbers is just inconvenient or simply not possible. For these times, we rely on "ol' unreliable" (our memory).

All recent theories in mind development agree that, like the universe, there is no known limit to one's memory. Remembering people, faces, sounds, smells, sights and other more "interesting" things than numbers seems to be much easier for most people. Why is that?

Numbers, unlike most concrete objects, cannot be visualized well. They do not make a strong enough impression in the mind for us to be able to recall the numbers at will. Unlike trying to remember a vivid image, numbers just do not do well in our memories.

There IS a solution to this, and a very good one at that. It is referred to by many as the "Peg System". With the Peg System, you associate numbers 0 - 9 with sounds while creating words with the sounds made from the numbers you are trying to remember. Once the word is created, you vividly picture the words and associate them in a strange and memorable way. With this system, you only need to "memorize" ten general sounds associated with the ten numbers 0 through 9. Once you have those memorized, you will be able to memorize and recall a number of any length, forward and backward for as long as you wish to keep the number in your memory.

First, here is what you need to memorize: there is a non-vowel sound or sounds associated with each of the ten numbers. These sounds have nothing to do with the sounds of pronouncing the numbers. If there are multiple sounds associated with a single number, you will notice that the sounds are almost the same, as in the case of number 9 with the hard “p” and “b” sound. Here are the ten numbers and their associated sounds that need to be memorized:

1 = t,d,th
2 = n
3 = m
4 = r
5 = l
6 = ch,sh,j,cz
7 = k,g,qu
8 = f,v
9 = p,b
0 = s,z,tz

Therefore, to remember the number 1, we can use the word "tie" and visualize a crazy looking, colorful tie. Even though the word "tie" also has a long "i" sound, the long "i" is not one of our 10 non-vowel sounds so is ignored. These ignored sounds help us to construct words easily. Technically, because of the other sounds associated with the number 1, we can also use the word "die" or even the word "the" to remember the number 1, but the word "tie" is much easier to visualize.

In a more practical example, let us assume our gym membership number is "4268" and we need to present this number each time we check in. As we read the number, we make the sounds and start constructing the words as we can make them up. The numbers 42 can be the word "rain" (4 is the "r" sound and 2 is the "n" sound) and the numbers 68 could be the word "chef". When we create the first word, we need to associate the first word with something that will help us to remember what the numbers are for. Better yet, if you can create a single "scene" that will reveal the number to you, then do it. My image would be rain falling from the ceiling right over the sign-in counter at the gym, and then the rain turns to chefs. This is a hard image to forget and an easy one to picture. Now each time I come to gym I see the mental picture and get the number 4268 from r-n-ch-f or rain chef.

It is referred to as the Peg System because like hanging a hat on a peg, we are "hanging" our first image (hat) on the item that is associated with the number (peg). This first association is vital because otherwise you will have a bunch of demented images floating around in your head with no home.

Remembering numbers can not only be a great party trick to impress your friends, but it can come in handy when the need arises to remember important numbers. Train your memory. Practicing this technique will not only help with your memory recall, but it will help with your creative visualization as well.

Power crisis

Charge your cell phone for Rs. 10/- only. :-)

CHITRAL - Jan 14: People squat around a generator installed by an ingenious resident as their cellphones and wireless sets get recharged for Rs10 in the city that is facing a severe power crisis.—Dawn

Musharraf counting his last days?

What Mr. Chowdry is mentioning is evident of the power houses of Paki politics.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Remembering and Using People's Names


by Bo Bennett, DTM

It has been said that a person's name is the most important word in the world to that person. Using a person's name in conversation is one of the best ways to build rapport. Sounds good, but if you are like most people, the names of people you meet go in one ear and out the other. So step one is remembering the name.

Many memory experts believe that we all have perfect memories. We are capable of remembering just about any detail from our lives no matter how far back and how specific. The challenge is recalling the information from our memory.

There are dozens of techniques for remembering names; some work for some people and some do not. For this reason, I am listing many of them for you to choose the one that works best for you. You may want to adapt a few techniques rather than just one. For example, use a visual technique for those you meet face to face, and when they tell you the names of their children, use an association technique to associate the person you met with their children's names. The key again is to use what works best for you.

Here are some steps that should all be followed each time you meet someone:

1) LISTEN AND PAY ATTENTION TO THE NAME. So obvious, yet so overlooked. Pay attention to the name when it is given to you and make sure you can recall it 5 seconds later. If you can, you are halfway to putting this name in your long-term memory.

2) Repeat immediately. The first sentence out of your mouth after hearing a name should include that name. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Jennie". Use this instead of "Jennie, it is nice to meet you" because saying the person's name right after they say it is often a mindless automated response that does very little, if anything, toward helping you remember the name.

3) Repeat often. Be careful with this one. You do not want to sound like a psycho, or worse a pushy salesperson, by overdoing it. However, people love to hear their own name and this technique will keep your listener interested in what you have to say.

4) End the conversation with their name. This is the best way to end any conversation. "Jennie, it was great meeting you". This not only once more sinks their name into your memory, but says to the person that you have cared enough to remember their name.

5) Comment on and/or ask questions about the name. "Jennie, have you always been called Jennie or do people call you Jen as well?" or "Do you spell Jennie with a 'y' or 'ie'?" If it is a unique name, ask about its origin or say that it is a beautiful name (if you really think it is).

6) Review. After the conversation is over with the person, review their name and face in your mind several times. Do this frequently over the next 24 hours. As you get better with steps 1-5, this step will become less important.

Memory is linked to your senses and emotions. As you incorporate more emotion and more of your senses into remembering a name, the name will become more difficult to forget.

Now here are some techniques used to remember names:

1) Face association. Examine a person's face discreetly when you are introduced. Try to find an unusual feature, whether ears, hairline, forehead, eyebrows, eyes, nose, mouth, chin, complexion, etc. Create an association between that characteristic, the face, and the name in your mind. The association may be to associate the person with someone you know with the same name, or may be to associate a rhyme or image from the name with the person's face or defining feature.

2) Substitution. Take a person's name and substitute objects that you can visualize with that name. Then associate those objects with the person somehow. For example, "Murphy" can be substituted with "Murphy's oil soap". Visualize the person pouring the soap all over them while dancing the jig. Why dancing the jig? The more outrageous you make the visualization, the better it will stick to memory. Just try not to laugh when making the association, especially if the person is in the process of telling you they have just been fired.
3) Paint their name on their forehead. OK, not literally, but in your imagination. Use your favorite color paint and clearly see each letter as you paint it. If you are standing closer than a few feet from the person, do not look directly at their forehead but rather between their eyes.

4) Association with someone you know. Associate the person you meet with someone you know or know of with the same name. Then visualize the person you know in the same situation as the person you have met. For example, if you meet a "Will" picture your Uncle Will (assuming you have an Uncle Will) standing there, in that same spot. To make the association stronger, visualize your uncle Will doing something that he is known for doing - like his loud drunken laugh.

If you forget the person's name at any time during the conversation, THIS IS THE TIME TO ASK. Do not be embarrassed to say something such as, "Forgive me but I've forgotten your name..." or "I am sorry, what was your name again?" Remember that most people forget names. Those who make it a point to humble themselves and ask for a name again are seen as someone who cares about learning the name.

The more you do this, the more second nature it will become and remembering names will be an automatic process for you. Using names in conversation will take you a long way in building and maintaining rapport, as well as helping others to both remember you and like you. You will soon find that remembering names becomes a game and it is really quite fun, not to mention one of the best skills that anyone can possess!

Friday, January 11, 2008

Believe in Yourself


by Bo Bennett, DTM

I have a great idea for a reality TV show. We begin with 10 people who are successful in their fields, but not famous or even well-known. Dress them up in clothing a homeless person would wear, give them a new identity and a history of nothing more than a grade school formal education and a series of odd jobs, then drop each one of our "participants" off in a major US city. The goal is to a) stay in the game and not quit and b) to acquire as much wealth as possible by the end of the season (about 3 months). The rules are that the participants cannot reveal their true identity and they cannot accept help from anyone they know in their real lives. What an awesome show that would be. We would witness the human spirit in action as well as characteristics and qualities of truly successful individuals. How would you do as a participant on that show?

There are so many people who appear to be successful and happy, who are financially well off, yet live in a constant state of fear. This is the fear of financial loss, which is almost universal to all those who are new to wealth. What if I lose my job? What if the market crashes? What if my business fails? All of these "what ifs" conjure up unpleasant thoughts for just about everybody; but those who believe in themselves, in their abilities, talents, and determination, do not fear these potential unfortunate events. A common characteristic among successful people is their knowing that if they lost everything financially, in time they would get it all back and more.

Unless you are a lottery winner or an heir/heiress to a fortune, you have earned what you now have. You must believe that your success is not due to random luck, but is a result of the circumstances that you have created, or at least influenced in the past. Those who fall down and don't get back up are the ones who lack the self-confidence and belief that they are the reason for their success, and if needed, can do it all again.

Donald Trump is a man who proved that success is not in what you have, but in who you are. Here is a man with enough belief in himself to come back from being $900 million dollars in debt to net worth of over a billion dollars in a relatively short period of time. When disaster struck Donald, he did not resign himself to flipping burgers to "make ends meet". His strong self-image and belief in himself allowed him to get right back on top.

Fortunately, very few of us will ever be put to the test of such drastic misfortune. Your belief in yourself is like a no-cost insurance policy that will keep you from fear of financial loss and allow to you enjoy what you have earned. Your talent, abilities, determination, and your other characteristics have gotten you where you are today. Believe in yourself and enjoy success.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Time Mgt - Insight into Hard Work & Smart Work

Here is a small incident, a must read.
There were 4 professors of Psychology, waiting for a train to come. Just then the train arrived and all the 4 professors rushed inside, only to realize that the train will depart after an hour. While wait at the railway platform, sipping the cup of tea, they started a discussion and did not realize the time.
One of the professors realized that the train has started moving and he ran and he caught the train. Seeing this, the second professor too caught the train. Seeing the second professor catch the train, the third one somehow managed to catch the pole of the last compartment and was able to catch the running train.
And the train, left the station. The fourth professor was left high and dry and the train departed. He started crying vehemently, “I missed my train, I missed my train.” One passerby asked him why he was crying so loud and reassured him that after 20 minutes, one more train would come and go to the same destination where he had to go. And this professor said, “It was me who had to travel in that train, the three professors who had caught the train had actually come to see me off.”
Friends although the three professors were successful in catching the running train, they all caught the wrong train. Just because you are you catch a running train does not mean you have caught the RIGHT train and it also does not mean that you are successful in reaching your destination.
In my career as a Time Management Trainer, I have observed a lot of what WE CAN DO and SHOULD NOT DO to increase our daily results. Time management is not necessarily working "HARDER", but rather, "SMARTER” and "SHARPER".
To achieve something significantly more in our day, we need not increase our efforts or the numbers of hours we put in. What is required is the right setting of Goals and managing our priorities.
Just look at somebody winning an Olympic Race. The person who wins the race gets a Gold Medal and the runner up gets a Silver Medal. The Gold Medalist wins the gold medal not because he ran twice as fast or twice as far then the Silver Medalist, but, it was just a “nose ahead”.
Friends, this is what we need to do with our daily lives. We need not run twice as fast or put in twice the effort to significantly increase our daily success. We only need to be a "nose ahead" of where we already are.
We are all productive in our days. We would not survive the demands of this world if we were not. The real challenge is how much more productive can we become? A lot of our Time Management has to do more with what we are not doing rather than what we are doing.
So, now is the Right Time to do The Right Thing, sit for a while and find out what are you not doing now that you should or you must be doing, and start doing that. Ask yourself one question, “Are you working HARD, in the RIGHT Direction or are you just working Hard.”

www.LeaderWorkshop.5u.com

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Job Security


by Bo Bennett, DTM

Today, the traditional idea of "job security" is virtually non-existent. No longer does getting hired mean getting hired for life. Mergers, layoffs, downsizing, corporate restructuring, focus shifting, bankruptcy -- the list of terms that are synonymous with "you’re fired" goes on. It seems as if your job security is completely out of your control... or is it?

Security is number two on Maslow's hierarchy of needs, second only to our physiological needs. It is no wonder that job security is such a pressing and controversial issue today. People traditionally think of job security as the choice of keeping the same job for as long as desired. This is done in the form of tenure or other long-term contract. Finding this kind of job security is extremely rare. However, if job security is viewed as the ability to keep a desired job, not necessarily the same job, and certainly not necessarily for the same organization, then job security is both readily available and within your control.

While you cannot completely prevent being "let go" by an organization, you can reduce your chances. Here are a few ways.

  • Do your job the best you can. Don't just go through the motions. If you were a manager having to choose only a handful of employees to stay on and the rest would be let go, would you choose those who do the bare minimum or those who give it their all? Even if your best is not good enough, your dedication and commitment may be.
  • Make yourself a key player. Take on additional responsibilities without necessarily taking on more work. Make yourself indispensable. Be proactive in sharing ideas and play an active role in your organization's success.
  • Never rest on your laurels. The fact that you once were an important part of an organization does not mean much when it comes to cut-backs. What have you done lately? What are you working on now? Just like success, your value to an organization is based on what you do on a regular basis, not just what you have done in the past.
  • Keep up with the times. If you were to re-apply for your job today, would you be hired? As the requirements and expectations for positions change, those filling the positions must change as well. Ask for the requirements of someone applying for your position regularly just to make sure you are still a good candidate.

No job security? Don't get mad, get smart. Who or what is to blame for lack of job security? Do we blame automation? Management? Owners and stockholders? Do we blame the younger people with fewer financial responsibilities that are willing to work for less, or foreigners in other countries who can work for much less? Or perhaps we don't blame anyone or anything; we accept these as standard business practices in a modern economy and focus on creating our own job security by becoming less dependent on the organization for which we work and more dependent on our own resources. Here are a few ways.

  • Be marketable. Always be working to improve your abilities, talents, and skills.
  • Have a backup plan. Why spend your valuable time worrying about losing your job when we can spend that time focusing on your success? Be prepared for a sudden loss of your job by having a plan of action, then put it out of your mind. This will help your self-confidence, allow you to perform better at your current job, and reduce your chances of being let go.
  • Create multiple streams of income. Even with a full-time job, you can create additional streams of income by making your money or creativity work for you. Real estate or financial investments can be a good source of extra funds that require very little time and energy. Side businesses can require very little money and produce unlimited rewards. When you have multiple streams of income, you have a kind of "job security" that is more solid than any tenure or long-term contract.
  • Change your attitude. Job security can be a great thing, but so can the opportunity to start over and do something you've always wanted to do -- something about which you are passionate. People who give too much weight to security tend to ignore their self-actualization needs and never truly live the best parts of life. Job security is not everything.

While traditional job security, or guaranteed employment with a single organization, is virtually non-existent these days, you can increase the chances of your job being more secure. From a non-traditional point of view, one can have the ultimate job security by not focusing on a particular job with a particular organization, but rather by focusing on a reliable income. Job security is within our reach, we just need to be sure we are reaching for the right kind of job security.